#Eggsy Unwin writing

[renx01]

You called

Prompt: “You came.” - “You called.” Pairing: Harry Hart x Reader Fandom: Kingsman Warnings: Angst, mentions of blood and injuries, honeypot mission Word count: 1511

‘Galahad.’ It was barely a whisper which came out of your mouth. The predicament you were in wasn’t as you had planned. The mission in and of itself was relatively simple: go to an event, talk to some high ranking people and criminals in order to gather information, and leave. Yet, here you were sitting on the floor in an alley, bleeding from a gunshot wound.

It had been going quite well. Your target, Vincent Giante, had been at the event early and you had approached carefully but confidently. Merlin had informed you that he was, in fact, a ladies-man, and that it could be of use to, as he said, “throw your womanly charms at him”. You ended up following that advice after the target had shown interest in you, most likely due to the rather revealing emerald-green dress you were wearing. ‘My, my, a lovely young lady at an event such as this one, alone and seemingly without a date.’ Vincent had said to you as he approached. It sounded vulgar as he said it, as if she were a piece of meat, an object which he was intent on owning. That would never happen in a million years if you had any say in it. You did, however, have to play into it. ‘Why thank you, I’m flattered.’ You say as he grabs your hand and leans down to kiss it, his touch lingering a tad too long for your liking. ‘So what’s your name darling?’ ‘Josephine.’ Was what you answered as you heard Merlin in your ear. Target on lock. Vincent made small-talk with you for a bit before the two of you were approached by a man. ‘Sorry, boss, that I have to interrupt your conversation with this lovely lady.’ He leans in and whispers something to his boss which you’re unable to hear. That’s Vincent’s right-hand man, Giovanni. Be careful around him, he can be quite the fighter. Merlin informs you before the pair can shift their focus back to you. ‘Sorry love, I have to go meet with some people.’ He sounded genuinely disappointed. He leans in to kiss your cheek and whispers in your ear. ‘If you’re feeling up for it, meet me outside in an hour.’ 

Time passed slowly as you waited to meet up with Vincent. You were in fact, not feeling up to it, but it was too good of a chance to pass up. During that time, you mingled with some more of the guests, but were unable to gather any information that was particularly of note. Merlin, on the other hand, was able to gather the information that Vincent supposedly had a harddrive with him which contained some secret documents which the Kingsman could use to folly his organisation’s plans. As the agreed upon time approaches, Merlin fills you in about the surroundings and what to look out for. Supposedly, Giante would have the drive somewhere on this person, so the goal had shifted from gaining information to getting the harddrive without being caught. 

Outside, it was quiet, the hustle and bustle of the event left behind. Vincent stood near a statue in the gardens, seemingly alone, yet you knew better. It was likely that multiple of his men would be surrounding the two of you, looking out for his well-being. ‘Josephine, I’m glad you came.’ He smiles and puts his hand on your shoulder. ‘Let us walk for a bit, I’ve been inside all day.’ You take the arm which was offered to you and join him.  After ten minutes you reach a part of the gardens which seemed completely isolated. Slowly, he tries getting closer, putting his hand on your lower back as he whispers things in your ear. You endure them, finding them disgusting but pretending to love the attention. Slowly, he starts kissing your neck and eventually mouth. If it weren’t for your training and experience, you probably would’ve gagged as his hands slowly started lowering further. Finding your focus again, you shifted it to trying to find the harddrive on him, roaming your hands over his body. Eventually, you feel it in one of his pockets, and slowly but surely, you try to get it out. As he starts getting more passionate you manage to grab hold of it. Slowly, you slip it into one of your hidden pockets. After a few more minutes you pull back and look him in the eye, smiling kindly. ‘We should take this elsewhere.’ Taking his hand, you lead him back to where the event was taking place. He seemed quite content for the time being, but you weren’t too convinced. Well done agent Kay, get out of there. 

Vincent leads you back inside to a relatively quiet corner, stopping a moment to talk to one of his men. As you look around, you suddenly hear a click just behind you. ‘Now love, I had so much fun, but I’d prefer it if you handed back that harddrive.’ Vincent sticks out his hand while the man behind you slowly pushes the gun against the back of your head. ‘We can talk about this Vincent.’ You slowly walk up to him. Agent Kay what are you doing? Get out. Merlin almost screams in your ear as you try to remain as possible. You slowly put your hands up, ‘I was enjoying myself quite a bit, but I suppose that is now over?’ your voice is almost sickly sweet. The hand he was holding out slowly wraps around your chin, tilting it up. ‘It’d be a pity to lose this pretty face.’ You were stalling quite a bit, that was clear.

Kay, Galahad is on his way. Just get out of this venue.

Galahad, that was your sign. Your colleague was on the way and you only had to get out of the building. Leaning into his touch, he clearly gets distracted once again, just enough to pull out a small knife and throw it backwards into the man that was pointing a gun at you. Turning, you grab hold of the lead and break the man’s fingers, then shooting him with his own gun, followed by shooting Vincent in the head. ‘A shame really.’ You scoff before turning and running into the crowd, 8 men following you, their guns loaded. Every step felt hot, so very hot, and they were right on your heels. ‘Fuck’, a soft whisper escaping you as they start firing their guns.

Kay, I need you to confirm that you are on the way out. ‘Confirm Merlin, I just have to lose some people.’ Heels continue to click where-ever you go. After turning a corner in one of the many hallways, several more of the men following you go down as you disarm and shoot them. That is until you didn’t have any ammo left. Of course this would happen to you, as if your day wasn’t going terribly already. ‘At least I still have these ones.’ You throw a few knives, hitting several throats. Their blood covers your face. Around you several bodies lay and you are finally able to breathe, even if it’s just for a moment. ‘Galahad, do you copy?’ You say quietly as you continue walking through the maze of hallways. Several footsteps can be heard from several of the hallways around you, so you start running once again. 

‘Merlin, where is Galahad?’ 

You don’t get a response.

Managing to finally get outside, heading into a dimly lit alleyway, you see over a dozen people following you. Pulling out your own gun, you shoot as many of them as possible while continuing to move. They shoot back, one hitting you in the leg. 

‘Fuck.’

They seem to keep on coming, and slowly, they surround you. ‘Galahad do you copy?’ Bodies keep on falling, but time seems to be running out when another bullet hits you, this time in your left shoulder. Frustrated, you throw some more knives and grab one of your daggers. One by one they go down, and with every body that hits the ground, your green dress becomes more red and your limbs are covered in blood. As the last of your energy slowly leaves your body and you start feeling faint. 

‘Galahad.’ 

It was barely a whisper which left your mouth. Before you are able to say anything else, you feel a gun being put against your temple. ‘Calm down lady, drop the knife.’ There was only one man left standing and he had the obvious advantage. You sigh, letting the weapon fall to the ground. 

You had to find a way out of this situation, you always did, but your body seems to be done. A gunshot interrupts your train of thought, the gun which was held against your head, falling away. Turning, you see Galahad standing there.

‘You came.’

Your voice sounds exhausted as you stand there; shoulders slumped and body aching. Your colleague approaches and hugs your body tightly.

‘You called.’

He whispers in your ear before kissing the side of your head.

[0-803s]

lay all your love on me.

eggsy unwin x fem!reader

  eggsy's life was a bit... hectic. you knew this very well, and if you even stopped to think about it, it was comical.

between the two of you there was no fight over which of you worked more. because you were a normal citizen and really didn't have an ounce of envy of your boyfriend's work. eggsy—or better said, agent galahad, had a job that, to begin with, you wouldn't even know what it was if it weren't for the man's desperate circumstances of having you in his life forever.

  harry even begged him to continue with the charade of being a carefree young man for a longer time. but, he couldn't. after seeing you for the first time, he was sure he wanted to trust you with all his secrets. so, after what was like two dates, eggsy had to tell you the whole truth after acidentally wearing the elegant shoes with sharp poison spikes to the thrid date who happend on a very charming restaurant.

  it had been a somewhat risky decision, and obviously, he had done it without the consent of any other kingsman agent. but as he himself said: everything had worked out in the end! almost everything, actually.

  there were days when eggsy would leave early and return two days later. there were days when some bruises were visible here and there. and every day, when you were alone in the bed to start your own day, you prayed to god or any other entity that was willing to listen to your despair, that eggsy would come home. and that day was no different.

after arriving home and being greeted by darkness, you turned on the lights and felt something comfortable in your body. eggsy had called quickly to say he would be home for dinner. and there you were in the kitchen trying to do the least for the person you loved most in life. the love eggsy felt was the same as yours, multiplied by two. he couldn't imagine himself in a world where the woman who was the source of his courage to stay alive didn't exist. from the moment he had seen your figure in that huge ballroom in one of his missions, he knew it that his life it would depended on you.

and that feeling grew when he brutally opened the wooden door of the house you shared. the first to receive it was JB, who soon stopped before moving a little closer. the dog stood still like a statue, with only his little tail swaying from one side to the other. eggsy was totally dirty.  clothes that were once high quality and beautiful, torn and covered in mud.

eggsy sighed as he stared at JB, slowly walking towards you. it was inevitable, there was no way not to notice his presence. a huge stain of dirt, standing in front of you. eggsy laughed as your eyes widened. and he kept laughing when you hugged him. after a few seconds, the realization hit. he was filthy but still, you hugged him tightly.

"my god, you scared me." eggsy heard you whispering. the man closed his eyes and inhaled the smell of food, the smell of your perfume. JB was whimpering as he scratched eggsy's leg.  for the first time, eggsy realized he had a family he would die for.

"what happened to you? you're filthy." you said with a giggle, pulling away from your boyfriend and looking at your own clothes which were also dirty after the hug.

"i love you." eggsy said holding your wrists, and then hugging you again.

"oh... i love you too." the sudden statement left you a little confused but happy. when eggsy released you again, you immediately turned off the stove so as not to burn the fish, following eggsy around the house with JB on your arms while he told you about his adventures.

hallway, living room, hallway again, bedroom.  eggsy pretended not to notice your big, bright eyes as he told everything and made jokes about almost dying.

"anyways, i missed you." he said with a sincere smile and then faced JB, petting the dog's small head. "and I missed you too, little thing."

when you and eggsy had met, he was still like a dog that had been thrown into the street. afraid to trust anyone, with armor in his heart. he was totally different now.

"you should take a shower, seriously." you said laughing. eggsy was still dirty as hell. the scene was even funnier after he said that he had fallen with his car and everything into the water and crawled in the dirt.

"well... you're dirty too now..." he said with a small smile, raising his eyebrows. you gently dropped JB to the floor, grabbing your boyfriend's arm as he walked into the bedroom's bathroom.

"oh? tell me more about it, mister galahad." you said, closing the bathroom door, leaving JB in the bedroom.

ps: the story takes place in the second film, when eggsy fights with charlie but eggsy doesn't have manhole dirt for the sake of this story.

— you can make a request whatever you want!

[drabbles-mc]

Third Floor

Eggsy Unwin & GN!Reader

Warnings: 18+, language

With the help of This Prompt List by @creativepromptsforwriting and my trusty Wheel of Names with every character I’ve ever written for, I’m aiming to write a fic in 500 words or less every day of March.

Prompt: rabbit

Word Count: 300

A/N: I've been writing Kingsman Fics for essentially 10 years at this point and this is the first time I've ever written readerfic for it. I don't know what else to say! I'd kill a man for Eggsy Unwin.

The only thing that Eggsy could hear over the blood rushing in his ears was the sound of his feet every time they struck the concrete. His arms and legs felt like they were moving of their own accord, doing whatever it took to keep him safe, to let him live to fight another day.

The footsteps behind him began to slow, but it didn’t stop Rottweiler from calling out after him, “Can’t run away from us forever, you know! Fuckin’ rabbit hops will only get you so far!”

Eggsy knew he was right, but it was working for now. Racing along the string of upper balconies, he got to the very end of the building before finally making himself skid to a stop. He crouched down and allowed himself a couple beats, hoping to get his breathing somewhat back to normal before he asked you to let him in again. Always the stray landing on your doorstep, or rather, windowsill.

When he heard the ruckus starting to pick back up down below again he knew he didn’t have any time to waste. Rapping his knuckles against your window, he only had to wait a few seconds before he heard you twisting the lock from inside.

Pushing the glass upward, you stuck your head out. ��Biggest fuckin’ pigeon I’ve ever seen!” you joked.

He laughed, and you watched him shake his head, little beads of sweat starting to drop down the sides of his face. “Very funny.”

You popped the window open a little bit more to make it easier for him, stepping back and to the side so he could slip in as smoothly as possible. “Come on, then. Got your nest ready for you and everything.”

He hopped in and shut the window behind him. “Thanks for that.”

[echothefandomeater]

Lean On Your Team

Paring: Agent Galahad Jr x GN!Reader x Agent Whiskey

Genre/Warning: Talks of blood, injury on the shoulder and passing out in the shower. Eggsy and Whiskey argue (but what's new there.) The reader is also a kingsman agent so it’s suggested that they’re British.

Words: 908

Summary: Hiding an injury from two Agents argue a lot and who care a lot about you is easy until you pass out in the bath and they have to help you.

A/N: Does this make sense? Probably not since I wrote this from my late night writing inspiration. Apologies if Eggsy and Whiskey seem out of character, this is the first time I’ve written them properly. I’ve been having massive Kingsman brain rot so if you like this piece feel free to send any other requests for Kingsman characters (literally any of them from the first two movies.)

The bickering between them was starting to get on your nerves. 

“If you would have been careful with your shot-“ Eggsy cut Whiskey off. 

“Well if you hadn’t tried to tie him up as I was shooting-” this time, you cut them off.

“Can you both just shut the fuck up?!” Both of the men looked taken back at your sudden outburst “You have been arguing ever since we left and in case you couldn’t tell, all three of us are tired! So please I would like to get to the safehouse without developing a headache.”

This seemed to shut both agents up and the silence felt like heaven to your ears.

You all continued walking. You looked down at your shoulder and lifted your suit jacket lightly. You held back a grimace at the blood not wanting to worry the already injured Whiskey and Eggsy about your injury, you would just clean it up when you got to your own room.

—-

Finally you all arrived, in true southern fashion Whiskey took off his shoes before entering the safe house and collapsing on the couch, Eggsy followed suit and looked like he was about to fall asleep right there. You on the other hand began making your way up the stairs to your temporary room. You couldn’t wait to get these disgusting clothes off and put on fresh ones.

You shut the door and went into the bathroom turning on the shower, even just the steam building up from the hot shower made you sigh in relief. You carefully dragged the clothes off your body, occasionally your clothes would stick to the wound making you hiss from the pain.

Eventually you got into the shower and it felt like such a relief, such a relief that you started getting sleepy, you tried to catch yourself before you fell asleep but the last thing you remember seeing was the ceiling.

—---

The crash heard from the bathroom had both agents up and off the couch with weapons ready. Eggsy nodded silently towards the stairs and Whiskey nodded back.

Slowly with Eggsy leading they made their way up the stairs with minimum creaking from the stairs. They made their way towards your room hearing the sound of the shower, they pushed the door open and Eggsy called out your name, when no response came he made his way to the bathroom. 

He stopped nervously, his hand hovered over the door handle, scared what he would find behind the door. Images of you lying there dead because someone was here and they didn’t check flashed through his head. He was terrified to lose you after what happened to Roxie albeit his feelings were less platonic but he still couldn’t stand it, he never wanted to lose anyone like that again.

Whiskey watched him and could see the nerves on his face, he could admit he was having the same feelings of fear but he couldn’t stand by so he pushed Eggsy out the way. He pushed the door open.

The sight of you bleeding passed out in the shower made both their hearts jump. 

—--

Next time you woke up it was in the bed. You opened your eyes slowly and squinted at the low light of the room. What caught your attention though was both Eggsy and Jack watching you from the bottom of bed, no suit jackets or ties and sleeves rolled up, Jack didn’t even have his hat on. 

They were both frowning, Eggsy had his hands in his pockets and Whiskey had his crossed across his chest. You spoke and it came out very dry. “Don’t tell me you two have been arguing again” neither of them responded.

Jack left the room muttering something about water to Eggsy and he nodded. Once Jack had left Eggsy approached you “when were you planning on telling us you got stabbed?” He spoke to you like he did to Galahad Sr when he was reckless and it made you scowl. Still you made no eye contact with him.

“Agent Percival” The use of your codename made your eyes automatically snap up to his, the look he gave you made it clear he wasn’t giving up so easily.

You huffed “I was going to deal with it myself but I didn’t exactly plan on passing out in the shower.” His eyes narrowed.

“You seem to have forgotten the most vital part of your training, Percival” you furrowed your eyebrows in confusion “teamwork.” You rolled your eyes at how cheesy it sounded when he said it.

Jack came back into the room with a glass of water and a pack of painkillers, he handed them to you. “He’s right, it's something they nail into our heads at Statesman, there's a reason multiple Agents are assigned to cases” once again you rolled your eyes before finally speaking up. 

“Okay I get it! You don’t need to treat me like a child just because I’m less experienced than you both” You snapped at them before taking two painkillers out the packet and taking them with the water you were given.

Finally Eggsy sighed “Just next time…” you prepared yourself for another lecture but he trailed off like he was unsure what to say.

“Ask for our help when you need to” Jack finished for him. Your pissed off attitude retreated slightly seeing both their faces soften an inch.

“Yea I will… I’ll make sure I do”

[mannersmakethzine]

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[tickle-bugs]

The Ol' Kentucky Welcome

Summary: Eggsy’s attitude gets him into trouble at Statesman HQ. Whiskey and Tequila show him how they handle mouthy recruits with too much pride.

Anon: Hey!  Love your work.  I was trying to think of something I haven't read.  So, kingsman and golden circle.  Maybe eggsy, whiskey, and Tatum s characters get real drunk one night, start teasing each other and a full out brawl of a tickle fight happens!!!  You can do it!!!  Thanks! 

Loose handwaving at and spoilers for Kingsman: The Golden Circle.

Becoming a Kingsman had done wonders for Eggsy’s impulse control and sense of self. He’s got restraint now, and better judgement—he doesn’t blindly chase a whim without considering the consequences first. 

This is what he tells himself as he poaches a bottle of premium Statesman Reserve whiskey from a supply closet rather ominously labeled ‘This Ain’t For Sharing, Friend’. He makes sure to shuffle the bottles to disguise the large gap left behind on the shelf.

He settles in at the Statesman briefing room table, loosening his tie and shirt collar. He unbuttons his jacket and, in a rare flash of bad manners, kicks his feet up onto one of the nearby chairs.

The thought of Harry scolding him for it tugs at chest. 

“Now what do we have here?” Whiskey whistles lowly, ducking into the doorway. Tequila fits in beside him. Eggsy gives a mocking salute before popping the cork on the bottle. He grabs a polished crystal glass from a platter on the table and pours himself a hefty bit. 

“Looks to me like we’ve got a thief, Whiskey.” Tequila arches his brow. “Y’ain’t learned your lesson yet, Galahad?”

“Gentlemen.” Eggsy smirks and lifts his glass. The sharp kiss of the liquor burns his tongue, but it washes back with a smoky smoothness unlike anything he'd ever tried. He smacks his lips loudly, enjoying the slight twitch of Whiskey’s eyebrow in response.

“Thought you fancy-types were supposed to be polite.” Whiskey puts his hands on his hips. 

“And I thought you brutish types couldn’t make something so delicious.” Eggsy angles the glass in the light. The liquid seems to glow. 

Tequila ducks past Whiskey and takes a seat at the table, helping himself to a glass. He clinks glasses with Eggsy and they share another sip. Both of them sigh in unison, sinking deeper into their chairs. Whiskey throws Eggsy’s feet off his chair and takes a seat. 

“You’re lucky I ain’t reportin’ you to Ginger Ale for theft.” Whiskey fixes himself a glass. He takes off his hat and rests it on the table. He shrugs off his jacket, draping it over the back of the chair.

“Report me for what?” Eggsy cocks his head. “You fine, upstanding gentlemen cracked open a bottle of your own reserve to share with your guest and I just had to say yes. Would hate to be impolite.”

Whiskey glares. Eggsy sips innocently. 

“I like this motherfucker, Whiskey.” Tequila laughs, muffling himself in his fist. Whiskey shifts his glare. 

“‘Course you do. You can’t keep your mug outta trouble to save your life.” 

“Least my mug ain’t ugly,” Tequila grumbles. Eggsy snorts. Whiskey turns to fish for a pack of cigarettes in his jacket pocket. As he leans forward, a silver shine peeks out of his pants pocket. Eggsy gently plucks a shiny lighter from Whiskey’s pocket and tucks it into his own. 

“Champagne mentioned you’re a cheeky bugger.” Eggsy knocks shoulders with Tequila and winks.

“I dunno what that means.” Tequila frowns. They both watch Whiskey fumble around for the lost lighter and keep smooth, straight expressions. 

“You get into shit. He’s fond of you?” Eggsy gestures at him. Tequila nods. 

“Yeah, well…he wasn’t always. I’ve always been a bit of a firecracker. Didn’t make the best choices. Got people hurt. Built up a reputation for bein’ a problem, and Champagne started makin’ me own it.” Tequila watches his whiskey swirl in his glass. Eggsy hums thoughtfully.

“Sounds like Harry. He didn’t let me get away with shit. If I did something reckless, it was my arse on the line. But sometimes it paid off.” Eggsy smiles and thinks of stealing Harry’s cab on his way out of initiation. 

“To good mentors.” Tequila inclines his head respectfully and raises his glass. Eggsy clinks their glasses together. 

The three of them pass the time draining the bottle and looking out over the twinkling lights of the distillery buildings. A boyish mischief settles into Tequila, one that grows as the liquor in the bottle sinks. Whiskey starts to slur his words, but he maintains a hunter’s focus. 

“Tell me somethin’, Eggsy. What brought you to Kingsman?” Whiskey watches him over the rim of his glass. His stare is piercing. 

“Hm. Harry did. Not so different from Tequila, I reckon. I’d made a right fuckin’ mess and Harry saved me from it. Gave me a job. He saw something in me that no one else did.” Eggsy traces his fingers along the edge of his cup. He glances absently towards Harry’s cell and sighs quickly. Whiskey follows his gaze. 

“Did your lepidopterist friend teach you to have sticky fingers, or do you just like causin’ problems?” Whiskey holds his hand out. Eggsy rolls his eyes and hands over the stolen lighter.

“I’ve always been good at nicking things. S’fun.” Eggsy grins and produces Whiskey’s wallet. Whiskey grumbles under his breath and snatches it. 

“Feels like you’re the only one of your people that ain’t all hoity-toity. What other secrets are you hiding?” Tequila leans forward. The question grates against Eggsy’s better instincts. He searches Tequila’s face for the slightest bit of ill will. All that sticks is the way light catches softly on his eyes. Eggsy hums and turns his eyes to the ceiling to think.

“Well, my girlfriend bein’ a princess isn’t much of a secret anymore, so…I was a gymnast for a bit.” Eggsy grins. Tequila’s eyes light up and he starts snapping in Whiskey’s direction. For each snap, Whiskey gives a disgruntled hm until eventually they’re just swatting at each other. 

“Whiskey, don’t we have them flippy bars down in the gym?” Tequila sniffs, blinking as the liquor hits his sinuses. Eggsy perks up. A spark of excitement picks up atop the warm flush of liquor in his stomach. 

“We do. For Statesman agents. Y’know Rum and Cognac get real touchy ‘bout their stuff.” Whiskey raises an eyebrow.

“Well, we’re workin’ together now, ain’t we? ‘Sides, Rum and Cognac ain’t here. Let’s walk him down there. I wanna see what he can do.” Tequila claps Eggsy on the shoulder. Eggsy gives his best winning smile. Whiskey grumbles, then downs the rest of his glass. 

“Fuck it. Fine. Five minutes.” 

…

They stumble down to the Statesman training facility, passing by a very tired Ginger Ale who opts not to ask why Eggsy’s wearing Tequila’s hat (pretty simple, it’s ‘cause he nicked it). Whiskey puts his thumb to a scanner and the wall unfolds for them. 

The lights click on in rows, lighting the industrial space. Eggsy gasps like a kid on Christmas morning. 

Sophisticated weight training and combat equipment sit in neat rows. Eggsy locks in directly past that, drifting unconsciously towards a heaping pile of chalk bags. Pommel horses, beams, bars, and hanging rings sprawl out on a spring mat, all in pristine condition. A few launchpads and trampolines lay near the equipment. Eggsy laughs incredulously as he takes it in. Nostalgia flutters in his chest. 

Eggsy immediately unbuttons his shirt, folding it cleanly and crisply. He shoves it and the cowboy hat into Tequila’s arms, adjusts his tank top, then works to unlace his shoes. The moment his feet are free, he sprints for one of the springboards. He hits it clean, just like he’d learned, and pushes off the vault, twisting through the air. His landing is a bit messy, but it’s functional, and he takes off to the parallel bars next.

The alcohol writhes in his system, but he doesn’t care. How can he? It’s been years. Coach’d told him he was good enough for the fucking Olympics and he hadn’t touched a set of bars since. The flex of the bars is a comfort to him. He flips and twirls, holding crisp handstands and tucks through muscle memory alone.

He dismounts beautifully from the parallel bars to the pleasant thrum of adrenaline and a smattering of applause. 

“Hoowee, that was somethin’!” Tequila ruffles Eggsy’s hair, destroying the last hold of the gel on his head. Eggsy laughs and swats him away. 

“Hats off to you, kid. Takes a lot of skill to pull that off.” Whiskey nods in respect. Eggsy returns it. 

“I ain’t gonna lie, I thought you were gonna fall on your ass. I’m impressed.” Tequila slugs his shoulder with a brassy laugh. 

“Thanks, Tequila.” Eggsy grins roguishly. “Mind givin’ me a boost?” 

“Sure.” Tequila follows Eggsy over to the high bar. Whiskey loudly clears his throat. 

“Boys, this has been…eye-openin’, but we really should get goin’. Early start tomorrow, I imagine. And this one’ll be fit to collapse when the time difference catches up.” Whiskey inclines his head towards Eggsy. 

“Sorry, bruv? Can’t hear you all the way over there.” Eggsy gestures to his ear with a cheeky grin. 

“I said—“

“No, no. If you have something to say, come whisper it in my fucking ear.” Eggsy snickers, hearing Merlin’s voice in his head. Whiskey rolls his eyes and saunters over. 

“Look, I respect you ‘cause Champagne respects you. Other than that, you’re still a brat that oughta fall into line. Let’s turn in for the night. Both of you.” Whiskey raises his eyebrow. The honey tones of his voice make his annoyance all the more amusing. 

“What’re you gonna do about it? Get me with your skipping rope?” Eggsy smirks. Tequila mutters a quiet aw hell and takes a step back. 

“Maybe I will, you little shit.” 

Eggsy comes to terms with a number of things about himself in that moment, and he puts them all away to process sober. Instead, he gestures for Tequila to give him a hand and reaches up for the bar. 

Tequila picks him up by the waist, and it’s not the smooth, assisted lift he’s used to. It’s the clumsy grip of a drunk surprised by weight. Tequila does lift Eggsy up to the bar, but at the cost of his dignity— he spasms and makes a high-pitched noise when Tequila’s fingers press into his waist.  

In hindsight, he should’ve seen the way Whiskey’s eyes narrowed at that. 

“What the hell was that?” Tequila squints up at him. 

“Nothin’. Thought you were gonna drop me. Bugger off.” Eggsy kicks weakly in Tequila’s direction. He backs up, hands raised. Whiskey steps in, hands on his belt. 

“Get off the bar, Eggsy.” Whiskey sniffs authoritatively. The logical Kingsman agent buried in Eggsy’s brain sets off warning bells, but Drunk Eggsy, who is obviously of much sounder mind, ignores it. 

“Make me, Whiskey.” Eggsy starts to swing in the space he has. Not enough to kick anyone, but enough to look like he will. He manages to rotate clumsily around the bar once, then hangs back down in front of Whiskey. 

“You want me to embarrass you in front of your new friend? Okay.” Whiskey steps up to Eggsy and makes a show of sizing him up. Then, quicker than the draw of his pistols, his hands latch onto Eggsy’s sides and squeeze until he’s screaming and plummeting off the bar. Eggsy’s short life flashes before his eyes as he falls bodily into Tequila’s arms. 

“Are you fucking mental?” Eggsy goes to shove Whiskey, but Tequila holds him back. 

“Woah, watch that mouth of yours!” Whiskey laughs, eyes glittering. “You told me to make you. Your wish is my command, friend.”

Eggsy kicks, trying to break Tequila's hold, and he catches Whiskey right in the balls. He makes a noise like a wounded donkey and folds over. Eggsy snickers. Whiskey whips his reddening face up and glares. 

“Now you’ve done it. Tequila!” Whiskey tosses something his way and he catches it. Eggsy barely has time to react before his arms are bound and hoisted in the air above his head. His toes brush the ground. The bar above him creaks in protest but does not give. 

Whiskey puts his hands on his hips again. Eggsy wonders if that’s a cowboy thing or an American one. 

“Skippin’ rope, bitch.” Whiskey grins, sharklike. “Now…you done with the whole insubordination routine or am I gonna have to give you the ol’ Kentucky Welcome?” 

Eggsy snorts derisively. He tests his bindings. They hold steady. Fear starts to pierce through his liquid courage. 

“I’m honored, bruv, but I’m in a committed relationship—“

Whiskey clicks his tongue and crowds into Eggsy’s space. He immediately steels himself for violence—what else would there be besides violence? He’s been jumped before. He’s no stranger to the predatory tilt of Whiskey’s head. He sets his jaw and glares. 

“When Tequila first joined up, he carried a bit of them clownin’ instincts with him. That didn’t fly with Champagne. We had to figure out a way to take him down a few pegs without hurtin’ him. So, the Kentucky Welcome was born.” 

“Aw, fuck you, Whiskey. Seriously, man.” Tequila pipes up from behind Eggsy. 

“What does this have to do with me? I know you Americans love to hear yourself talk, but I’m not interested.” Eggsy tries to pull free. Nothing. Whiskey’s gaze gets softer, more mischievous. The change is deeply unnerving. 

“Well, you remind me of Tequila. You’ve clearly got a good head on your shoulders, but you’re a little shit. So I’m gonna deal with you the same way we used to deal with him. Last chance, kid. You comin’ quietly or are we gonna have to drag you?” 

Eggsy flinches when Whiskey reaches for him—years of habit die hard—and prepares himself for the hard crunch of knuckles into his ribs. Instead, he’s met with a gentle and persistent scritching. 

A confused noise bubbles up at the back of Eggsy’s throat, quickly chased by a wobbly smile. He ducks his head and bites his lip. 

Oh what the fuck? 

Kingsman had taught him to resist the most painful and stressful of scenarios, but they’d never taught him what to do about this. Tilde’s maybe the only person who knows that he’s ticklish, and even then…he can convince her to let him go by kissing her senseless. Eggsy doubts that’ll work here. 

“Uh oh, Galahad. Don’t tell me something’s botherin’ you?” Whiskey presses an insincere hand to his heart. Eggsy’s brain stutters for a moment as he realizes that Tequila’s the one scratching at his ribs. 

“Fffffuck you.” Eggsy exhales sharply through his nose and closes his eyes--nope, that’s worse. So much worse. 

Whiskey tickles under his arms and Eggsy yelps, bright laughter tumbling after. It shouldn’t be this bad—Tilde’s done far worse to him in jest, but somehow the teasing grin of his begrudging allies gets under his skin. His arms flex as he tries to pull himself up and away, but his strength collapses with every breath. 

“Aw, y’all are twins.” Whiskey leans around Eggsy to smirk at Tequila. 

“Whiskey.” Tequila’s languished tone being hilarious really doesn’t help things. Eggsy’s entire face scrunches as he tries to find his way back towards composure. A hiccup sneaks into his chest, and then he’s giggling incessantly. His chest feels like the sparklers he’d run around with as a kid, bright and fizzling and dissolving with every breath. 

“Y’know, I wish I had tried this when I first caught y’all. Prolly woulda gone a hell of a lot faster.” Tequila’s voice floats past Eggsy’s ear. Eggsy manages a giggly growl and a halfhearted headbutt in his direction. Tequila tuts at him and folds his fingers into Eggsy’s waistline. 

He makes a noise at a pitch that threatens to shatter every lightbulb in the room. Tequila’s calloused fingers strum Eggsy’s nerves like guitar strings and it tickles, fucking shit—

Tequila hooks his fingers just so and Eggsy kicks. Whiskey snags his ankle before a second devastating impact can occur. They make tortuous eye contact. 

“Whiskey—“ Eggsy attempts to appeal to the cowboy’s humanity with what Merlin fondly calls his nuclear puppy eyes. 

Grinning wickedly, Whiskey shakes his head and reaches for his trapped foot. 

Eggsy’s eyes bug out of his head. 

He wrenches his leg free, twists his hands, and flips upwards. Managing a gold-worthy handstand into a dismount, he frees his wrists and lands smoothly. Eggsy playfully curtsies. Tequila starts to clap. Whiskey smacks him upside the head.

“Alright, I’m done playin’ around. Grab him. If we’re caught down here at this hour it’ll be my hide.” Whiskey gestures for Tequila to step in. He does so, still a little off-kilter from the liquor. 

Eggsy rushes in, expecting a clumsier rendition of the fighting style he’d been so painfully introduced to. Instead, Tequila smoothly blocks his blows and hoists Eggsy over his shoulder like a sack of fucking potatoes. One of his arms locks behind Eggsy’s thighs as they start to walk for the door. It takes him a moment to even process being upside-down. The sway of Tequila’s gait shakes some blood into his brain.

“Aw, y’all are twins.”

“—deal with you the same way we used to deal with him—“

A lightbulb clicks on in Eggsy’s head. He shouldn’t…but he could…but he shouldn’t—

He shoves his hands under Tequila’s arms. Before he can blink or breathe, they’re in a heap on the ground. Tequila’s cackling dead weight presses the air from Eggsy’s chest.

“Thought you’d put up more of a fight, bruv.” Eggsy’s eyebrows raise. Tequila shrieks at him in response. Eggsy manages to wiggle free and hop lightly to his feet as Tequila gathers his wits. 

“There’s one of you and two of us. Be wise.” Whiskey cracks his neck. Eggsy looks over at Tequila and smirks devilishly. Tequila pales. 

“I like those odds.” 

The flurry of motion as they charge each other sets off the ‘fight’ center in his brain, but there is some comfort in knowing no harm is on the table. Eggsy flips and twists out of their grasp, taking advantage of his flexibility to pull off increasingly ridiculous dodges. He neatly sweeps both Whiskey and Tequila’s legs out from under them. 

“Little help?” Whiskey gestures lamely at Tequila. 

“Nah, I’m done. Y’all are nuts.” Tequila lays on his back, putting his hat down over his face. He folds his arms behind his head. Whiskey curses at him. Tequila gives him the finger. 

Whiskey grabs Eggsy by the back of the shirt--really, he should know better--and Eggsy sweeps him again. Whiskey’s ready for it this time, though, and he manages a pin faster than Eggsy can roll away. Whiskey plants himself on Eggsy’s back like he’s settling on a bull. 

“Aren’t you tired? Goddamn.” Whiskey sighs. Eggsy winces at the texture of the mat against his cheek. 

It reminds him of Roxy and agonizing training sessions, of hours of sweat and bruising and his face stinging from being slammed into the mat. Even past the wave of grief, he remembers the shape of her smile when she would lecture him about letting her pin him on his stomach. 

“Indefensible,” she’d say, prodding the back of his ribs. “You’re a sitting duck like this.”

And every time he’d roll his eyes, hooking his fingers behind her knees--

Oh. Hm. 

As best as he can, he reaches back and latches onto Whiskey’s thigh, squeezing just above his knee. Whiskey hollers and tries to phase right through the floor. Eggsy rolls them over and pursues, squeezing and squeezing until Whiskey is a wheezing pile on the floor. 

Eggsy flips onto his feet. He knows he’s imagining the fond, ghostly squeeze on his shoulder, but he puts his hand on the spot anyways. 

“Now I’m tired. Goodnight, fellas.” Eggsy salutes with a wide grin, stepping over both cowboys. He gathers his belongings and saunters for the door, whistling pleasantly. 

Whiskey rubs a hand over his face as he stares up at the ceiling.

“Kid’s fuckin’ lucky I like him,” Whiskey grumbles, pushing himself up onto his elbows. 

“Might not wanna speak too soon. He took your hat.” Tequila puts his own ten-gallon back on his head and gestures towards the door with a whistle. Whiskey growls and shoots to his feet. 

“Motherfucker! Eggsy!”

[elletromil]

Sometimes, I write stuff

Based on this answer for @solrosan ask

@lottelorelei you migjt be interested in this too

Blue Dragons

They hear it coming first.

Not that they would know how to recognize the sounds of immense wings flapping into the night sky.

They feel the wind next. See the trees leaning to one side, as if trying to escape from a terrible storm.

More sound, as weaker branches start to crack under the assault of the strong winds.

Then, they see it.

Or rather, they see many a star all at once being obscured by that huge mass speeding in the village direction.

It is far too late to flee when the glow of the torches finally catches golden scales.

The ground shake under their feet when the Golden Dragon lands at the village's walls.

The walls had always seemed so tall to Eggsy, even after he was no longer a child trying to climb over them to go explore the world, unheeding of his mother's cries that he would break his neck. He never did, but he also never managed to scale the stones all the way over to the top until he was much older and much more experimented.

Next to the looming Golden Dragon, they seem puny. Inconsequential.

For the first time in his life, Eggsy is paralyzed with horror, his eyes riveted to the massive beast about to destroy their lives.

For the first time in his life, as the Golden Dragon cocks its head in his direction, Eggsy understand true despair.

None of their plans matter now. They never did.

It was pure hubris to think they could ever stand against Valentine.

Only a miracle could save them now.

And he's never believed in those.

[starofhisheart]

Ok but what abt rentboy Eggsy being hired by Harry Hart so that he can infiltrate his stepdad's shady business and Eggsy can finally rid himself and his family of the abusive prick once and for all. Their relationship is contractual, a means to an end, if there's a little sexual tension between them, so what? Its not like a fucked up twink from the streets could ever fit into a posh bloke like Harry's world...right?

[artknifeandglue]

Made-up fic title (if you'd like to answer): The scent of sucess

!!!! perfumer AU Hartwin

In which master perfumer Harry Hart gets his wallet stolen by a boy who doesn't succeed mainly because he HAS to know what damn scent Harry's wearing, and Eggsy Unwin turns out to be exceptionally gifted at distinguishing fragrances and composing them despite having no formal training, so he gets Hired (provisionally) and taught the ropes

[kpopgirlbtssvt]

Does anyone still write requests for Eggsy Unwin from The Kingsman?? I just rewatched the first movie and I was reminded how much I love him😭😭😍😍💜💜

[girasollake]

GIRASOLLAKE’s WRITING EVENT ✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:*

the event is over now!

❁ hi yall!! i’m doing this event to get creative and write some stuff since i haven’t written in like… forever

❁ basically i’m gonna be opening my requests until the 1st of september and you pick a character from this list (please also read these rules), a trope and a prompt from the lists below:)

❁ feel free to add smth from yourself that you’d like me to include in the one-shot and i’ll try my best to take it into consideration while writing!!

❁ if the request will be very similar to smth i have already written then i’ll probably won’t write it

❁ have fun!!<333

TROPES:

1. one bed

2. friends to lovers

3. enemies to lovers

4. lovers to strangers

5. forbidden romance

6. secret relationship

7. fake dating

8. jealousy

9. sibling’s best friend

10. best friend’s sibling

11. academic rivalry

12. unrequited love

13. childhood besties to lovers

14. mutual pining

15. exes to lovers

16. neighbours to lovers

PROMPTS:

1. "is this okay?" "it's more than okay."

2. their breath hitching whenever the other gets a little closer

3. playing with their hair until they fall asleep

4. holding them close and noticing the smell of their shampoo in their hair

5. annoying any other surrounding friends/teammates with their consistent arguing

6. "you left me! don't you realize i could have died?!" "that was the plan!"

7. not being able to say anything when watching the other get flirted with

8. "if we get caught, i'm blaming you."

9. "i'm sorry did you just say that this is fun?" "yeah, kinda."

10. returning each other's belongings, not wanting to be reminded of the other's existence

11. "why do you seem upset?" "why the hell do you think..."

12. leaving love bites on them

13. confessing their love when the other falls asleep

14. small gestures that mean a lot (ex. buying a fav candy)

15. (them buying a present) „it reminded me of you.”

16. “when was the last time you slept?”

17. you lay a hand on them one more time and i’ll take it clean off of you.”

18. waking up to them cooking breakfast for you

19. eye contact w/ sexual tension

20. subtle touches w/ sexual tension

21. just lots of *ekhm* sexual tension

22. stuck together in a room while being enemies

23. “please, for the love of god, shut up for once.” “why don’t you come over here and make me?”

24. kissing to shut them up

25. “you make me smile ... and also super horny, but that’s not the point. “

26. "come here, say it again"

27. back hugs.

28. when they wipe the corner of your mouth with their thumb

29. getting pinned against a wall

30. “oh, them? i don’t like them.” (they do). 

31. "what.. are we now?"

32. “wait- what if someone sees?!”

33. "I'm right here; I won't leave your side. Go back to sleep, darling."

34. praying that they don't notice their heart racing as they give them a hug

35. grabbing onto their partner's hand to establish their relationship

36. tracing over their scars

37. hugging and absentmindedly kissing their neck, resulting in mortification for one of them

38. telling them they deserve better (and silently wanting to be the one who gives it to them)

39. “this is the part where you’re meant to kiss me.”

40. "yeah no, 'sorry' isn't going to cut it this time."

41. being their server and getting flustered over how attractive they are

42. they forget something important

43. "how can something beautiful as love make one so unhappy?"

44. first kiss

45. first i love you’s…

46. first time

47. sharing an umbrella!!

48. "you. are. mine."

49. "what? no visicous insult about my clothes or hair? nothing?"

50. "my love language is bullying people." "you bully me. a lot." "..."

51. "are you okay?" "i'm convincing myself that I'm not in love with X."

52. "how come your so quiet?" "i don't really feel the need to talk. i like just... being around you."

53. "why can't we stay like this forever?" "who says we can't?"

54. "you drive me fucking crazy."

55. "please stay."

.・。.・゜✭・.・✫・゜・。.

prompts are mostly by @novelbear and @parker-fics

probably a few others but i forgot the @ cuz i forgot to write them down, pls forgive me:’)

[whumpdoyoumean]

Whumptober #6

xxx do or die

Eggsy isn’t sure where it all went wrong, exactly, whether it was a single bad decision or a million smaller ones that led him to walking directly into a trap. What he does know is that he’s monumentally fucked up, and now he’s going to pay for it. Probably with his life. He’s spent the last several weeks searching for the person or persons responsible for a string of disappearances within the SIS.

Well, he found the bastard. 

Or rather, the bastard found him.

Eggsy hadn’t even had the chance to fight back before he’d been injected with something and then he woke up here, handcuffed to a chair in nothing but his briefs. Even his earpiece is gone. His captor is standing in front of him, picking at his fingernails with a wicked-looking knife. 

He’s wearing Eggsy’s glasses. 

“These aren’t even prescription,” the man says, tapping at a lens with his knife. “And knowing you super-spy types, I’m guessing they aren’t just for the aesthetics. Is there someone watching you then?”

Eggsy doesn’t answer, just grits his teeth. It takes an enormous amount of effort to keep the snarky comments at bay. The man smirks

“There is, isn’t there. I’ve got an audience for this one. Now, that’s interesting. Changes my timeline a bit, perhaps, but I can work with this…” He tucks the knife into a sheath at his hip and then reaches into the pocket of his leather jacket, pulling out brass knuckles. He makes a show of putting them on his right hand, admiring them for a second before looking up at Eggsy, clearly gauging for a reaction. 

Eggsy doesn’t give him one. 

The man smiles again, then moves forward so suddenly that Eggsy doesn’t have time to brace himself before he’s smashed in the face, his head snapping to the side, a gash instantly opening across his (probably broken) cheekbone. He doesn’t move for a moment, just blinks a few times as he waits for his head to clear. And then he lifts his head and looks directly at the man, ignoring the sharp pain in his cheek and the accompanying ache hammering through his skull.

The man smiles. 

“You’re a tough one. Tougher than I’d’ve guessed from your fancy suit. I think I’m going to enjoy this.”

xxx 

It’s rare that Merlin feels completely helpless. But right now, that’s exactly what he is. Eggsy had been taken suddenly, without the chance to even activate his distress signal. It’s only because of the captor’s carelessness that Merlin even has eyes on the young agent--he’d tripped the glasses when he put them on, leaving Merlin with a front row seat to his violence. Eggsy is being held underground, so drones are useless, and Roxy is the only agent anywhere close to where Eggsy’s been taken. 

All Merlin can do is watch, and hope that Roxy gets there before Eggsy is killed. 

The kid is tough. Merlin knows that, had known it before they’d even started training. He had to be, otherwise Harry would’ve never brought him in in the first place. Even bloody and half-conscious, defiance is openly visible on Eggsy’s face. He obviously knows how to take a beating. Not that that makes this any easier.

The man’s been working on Eggsy’s ribs for the past few minutes. Merlin can hear the small gasps as the wind is knocked from Eggsy’s lungs. Every few blows, the man lets him catch his breath before starting in again. He hasn’t asked any questions. He isn’t looking for information. Merlin doesn’t need to see the man’s face to know that he’s doing this for no other reason than that he enjoys it, the sick fuck. 

It makes Merlin feel sick to his stomach. And it makes him angry, a simmering rage that he feels throughout his whole body. His hands are clenched into tight fists, knuckles white.

“Still not a peep?” the man says, his voice a mixture of surprise and amusement and annoyance and, beneath it all, the barest hint of admiration. He holds his bloodied hands up and turns them slowly, getting a good look at them. 

And then he brings the brass knuckles down and Eggsy’s knee, hard, and this time Eggsy screams.

“Bastard!” Merlin yells at the monitor, his heart hammering.

His fingernails dig into his palms.

He doesn’t notice.

Eggsy is panting now, his chest rising in small, sporadic bursts, and Merlin knows he’s struggling to catch his breath while also trying to keep from breathing so deeply that it hurts his fractured ribs. He looks up at the man, and while Merlin knows that Eggsy is looking at his captor's eyes, it feels like he’s staring directly at Merlin. Into him. 

“Lancelot, where the fuck are you?” Merlin doesn’t even try to keep the urgency (bordering on panic) from his voice as he looks over at the monitor that has Roxy’s feed.

“I’m still four minutes out from the coordinates you sent me, I’m moving as fast as I can,” Roxy responds, and it’s obvious that she’s as distressed as he is. “Have you found anything on the kidnapper?”

“Nothing,” Merlin says. “Haven’t had a good look at his face and there’s been no luck with voice recognition. Bring him in alive if you can. But you do whatever you have to do to get Galahad out of there, is that understood?”

“Yes, sir. Understood.”

Merlin turns his full attention back to the screen in front of him and his blood runs cold. The man has traded out the brass knuckles for a knife. 

“No,” Merlin says aloud. He doesn’t know who he’s speaking to, but he says it again, leaning forward in his chair. “No!”

The man steps toward Eggsy and places his left hand on Eggsy’s shoulder, bringing the knife up to Eggsy’s face. Eggsy flinches away from the blade and the man laughs, drawing it down his cheek. A thin line of blood wells up behind it. Eggsy’s gaze flicks up to meet the man’s, and once again Merlin finds himself staring into his agent’s eyes. 

There’s something different in his expression this time, and Merlin isn’t sure exactly what it is, at first. And then he realizes. Eggsy is looking at him. 

“‘s’okay, Merlin,” he says, voice low.

“Merlin?” the man laughs. And then he plunges the knife into Eggsy’s side.

“No!” Merlin screams it now, grabbing the edges of the computer monitor. “Shit! Lancelot, get in there now!”

He’s barely gotten the words out of his mouth when the man turns, and suddenly Merlin is looking into Roxy’s face. 

“Where the fuck did you come from?” the man says, and then the picture cuts off and the screen goes black. 

xxx 

Roxy fires two more tranquilizer rounds into the man’s back before she’s on her knees, patting down his unconscious form until she finds the key to the handcuffs. 

“Lancelot, update!”

“The suspect is down, but alive, I’m pretty sure,” Roxy says as she hurries to Eggsy’s side.

“And Eggsy?”

Eggsy is in a bad way. His face is a mess, with several open cuts leaking blood that runs down his neck and his bare chest. There are angry red bruises forming along both sides of his ribcage, and his left knee is dark and swollen. Worst, though, is the stab wound in his belly, which is leaking blood at an alarming pace, a small puddle already forming on the floor beneath him. At first glance, it doesn’t seem like he should be alive. But Roxy can see the shallow, rapid rise-and-fall of Eggsy’s chest, can hear the short, labored breaths.

“He’s alive,” she says as she hurriedly undoes the handcuffs, willing her hands to be steady because now, more than ever, she needs them to be. “We need medevac.”

“They’re on their way with backup, just a few minutes behind you.”

“Good,” Roxy says, shrugging off her jacket and balling it up as best she can before pressing it against the wound. Eggsy stirs, letting out a weak cry, and Roxy grimaces, looking up at him as his eyes flutter open. His mouth turns up in a weak smile that quickly vanishes into a wince. 

“‘ven smilin’ hurts,” he mutters, and his words are thick and clumsy around the blood in his mouth. “You…took your fuckin’ time. Wasn’ sure you’d get here.”

“Of course I got here,” Roxy says, heart plummeting as Eggsy’s eyes start to flutter. “Stay awake, Eggsy!”

“You’ve got to keep him awake!” Merlin says into her ear. 

“I know, I’m trying. Come on, Eggsy. Come on!” She pats his face and he stirs, looking up at her. She tries to smile. ��The hard part is over, all you have to do now is keep your eyes open. You can do that, right?”

“Trying,” Eggsy gasps. “Ain’t ‘s easy as it looks…S-sorry.” His eyes roll and then his lids fall shut, his chin dipping down toward his chest. 

“Eggsy!” Roxy swallows the lump in her throat. “Hang on. You just hang on, Eggsy.”

xxx 

It takes two surgeries, a dozen units of blood, and a chest tube to stabilize Eggsy. Merlin watches over him through all of it. It isn’t until he’s settled into the recovery wing that Merlin dares leave his side.

“Would you like me to call you when he wakes up?” a doctor asks as Merlin steps into the hall. 

“Yes, please,” Merlin says. “How long?”

“A few hours, at least.”

Merlin nods thoughtfully. “A few hours will be plenty of time.”

And then he heads for the holding cells, letting the relief he’s feeling give way to a cold, hungry rage. His fingers twitch in anticipation.

There’s a conversation he’s very much looking forward to having.

xxx 

[thrilmalia]

My favourite

“You lied to her?”

“I said blueberry was my favourite, when it’s raspberry.” 

She was ripping into her blueberry muffin and feeding me a piece before taking one for herself, then one for me and one for her again. When she asked me if it’s my favourite, how couldn’t I say ‘I love nothing more’. Does she know I meant this moment with her? That she could have fed me the licorice I hate and it would have tasted like ambrosia to me, because of her?

"You should tell her the truth, she'd want to know."

"I suppose I should.”

If you want to give this drabble some love on AO3, you can find it and others like it here

@ess-jay-oh @agentdagonet

[wilsons-corner]

so I caved.

so, I decided not to wait for the end of the poll, and write my first (published) fanfiction, regarding my Irish agent OC Finch, who works for an agency I completely came up with, Goodsman.

Please enjoy, don’t bash me for it, I’m just trying to have fun.

[drabbles-mc]

Lucked Out

Eggsy Unwin & Merlin

Warnings: 18+, missionfic, minor injury, hurt/comfort, canon-typical chaos

Written for the 2024 Heart Attack Exchange!

Word Count: 10.1k

A/N: it was such a blast to get so into a kingsman fic like this again. i'm glad i finally get to cross-post it here, too!

It was a perfectly comical scene from Eggsy’s perspective as he geared up to hop out the window at the end of the hallway he was currently sprinting down. He didn’t seem to have any concerns about the three men who were chasing him, yelling angrily at him, and perhaps most importantly of all, firing their guns off at him. None of them had very good aim, Eggsy only feeling a couple stings here and there through the suit he was wearing.

The sounds of their yelling got drastically quieter once he’d shot out the window and sailed right through it. The lack of a balcony directly on the other side would have been concerning if Merlin hadn’t already assured him that there was one over the window on the floor below. It would be just enough to cushion and slow his fall so he could tumble his way to the fire escape on the next building over.

There were no more gunshots, the men who had been chasing Eggsy not able to blow their cover so harshly that they could shoot out into a relatively busy street. It was a comfort but only a small one, because they would, without a doubt, send out a team of men to try and get Eggsy even if they couldn’t shoot him in broad daylight.

None of that really seemed to be bothering Eggsy either, as he was all but giggling as his feet finally hit the sidewalk on the next block over. He paused for a moment, taking a sharp breath in as he smoothed out his suit jacket.

“I wouldn’t pause for too long, Galahad,” Merlin chirped in his ear.

He was keeping his tone level enough, but Eggsy had been on the comms with Merlin enough in the passing months that he could tell when the man was annoyed and trying to hide it. That worked in his favor slightly, at least—it was far worse when Merlin was annoyed and not trying to hide it.

“Ah, come on,” Eggsy said as he started walking, his pace faster than a leisurely stroll but not so fast that it would raise any suspicions from other pedestrians on the street, “even you gotta admit that that was pretty cool. That was a pretty sick move back there.”

“That was nothing but luck back there,” Merlin countered without missing a beat. “If there hadn’t been—”

“But there was.” Eggsy cut him off because he already knew the argument that was coming. It was the same argument that they got into on nearly every mission. The only thing that changed was the details—last time it was a car that had keys miraculously left inside it, this time it was a extremely well-placed awning. Lucky breaks, as Merlin had taken to calling them.

That bit was funny to Eggsy, really. Because there hadn’t ever been a time when Eggsy considered himself to be a magnet for luck. But since joining Kingsman and having Merlin looking over his shoulder all the time, he was starting to think that maybe that was starting to change. Or maybe luck was really just a very astute and stressed-out Merlin on the other end of the feed from his lenses. But it sounded so much cooler to say that it was all luck.

“There was one balcony between you and the medical bay here, lad. Remember that.” The clicking of a keyboard came through the audio feed. “Take the next left here. Alleyway.”

Eggsy followed the instructions and cut across the street into the alley without a fight. That was the thing—more often than not Eggsy followed Merlin’s directions to a T. It was a high enough percentage that Merlin really could only say so much about the times when Eggsy decided not to follow the instructions. And, if Merlin was being honest with himself, he was no stranger to agents deciding to go against whatever orders or advice he was trying to give them out in the field. He shouldn’t be surprised when it comes from Eggsy, especially given who the kid’s mentor was. If anything, it was surprising that Eggsy didn’t go rogue more often.

“Can you at least admit it was cool?” Eggsy asked when he was about halfway through the alley.

Merlin sighed deeply and even though Eggsy couldn’t see him, he could picture the way that Merlin was probably shutting his eyes and pinching the bridge of his nose. “Galahad—”

“Say it was cool and I won’t bring it up again.”

“This isn’t a negotiation. Take this right.”

“I’m not negotiatin’!”

“Good. Now when you reach the end of this block, take a left and then head into the fourth building on the right. Navy blue door.”

Now that he wasn’t on a busy street, Eggsy picked up the pace. His quick walk turned into a jog as he hurried to follow Merlin’s directions. When he spoke up again, though, he didn’t sound at all like he was exerting any effort. That seemed to be a strength of his—never really getting winded.

“I’m gonna win this, you know,” Eggsy ribbed him, the grin audible in his voice.

Merlin bit back the sigh that was building in his chest. “It’s not a negotiation. And it’s definitely not a fight.” There was a split-second pause before he followed up with, “Not one that you’ll win, anyway.”

Eggsy’s laughter came in over the comms, drowning out whatever background noise was happening on the streets around them. “Y’know, it’s crazy that people don’t think you’re funny. I think you’re hysterical, bruv.”

“I’m not a comedian—people don’t need to think I’m funny.”

“Yeah, but they should still—” Eggsy cut himself off, “Navy Blue door?”

“Yes. When you go inside there should be stairs that lead up to the second floor. But if you go to the end of the hall on that first floor, there will be stairs that take you down into the basement. Storm doors lead into the tunnels—I can give you instructions from there.”

“Got it,” Eggsy confirmed, the business of it all creeping back into his tone for a moment.

Then the line was quiet. Not silent, per se. Merlin could hear Eggsy’s footsteps, his breathing, but not much else. That suited him just fine. Quiet was good. Silence meant that something went wrong. The last thing that Merlin wanted on the mission feed was silence, even if when the agents were on base it was the one thing he found himself practically begging for on a near-constant basis.

When Eggsy reached the door, he was expecting to find it locked. However, with one good shove, shoulder pressed to the old oak, the door gave way. The bottom of the door scraped the concrete slab that served as the top step on the other side. It had just enough resistance to let Eggsy know that it had been a long time since anyone had bothered to access whatever was on the other side. If the door itself hadn’t clued him in, the damp, musty smell that assaulted his nose once he opened it certainly would have. He huffed, nose crinkling, entire face scrunching for a moment as he quickly forced himself to get over it.

Once he placed his foot on the second step down, he started to pull the door shut behind him. The hallway hadn’t been affording him much light to begin with, but once he pulled the door shut it was immersed in utter blackness. It only lasted for a couple seconds before the night vision on his glasses kicked in. Everything was shades of black and green as he quickly descended the stairs.

“You know what you should make?” Eggsy asked as he half-jogged his way down the narrow steps.

Merlin sighed. “We’ve been over this, Galahad. I don’t make—”

“Hear me out before you go tellin’ me that, Guv.” When Eggsy was rewarded with silence from Merlin, he continued. “Why don’t you make lenses with lights in ‘em? What, got these things hooked up to every database in the world but you can’t give them a nightlight setting?”

As much as Merlin didn’t want to give him the satisfaction, he found himself chuckling. What Eggsy was asking for wasn’t particularly outlandish, especially not compared to some of the other ideas that he’d had over the last few months as he hopped from one mission to the next. However this one in particular had Merlin conjuring up the mental image of Eggsy wearing a headlamp, some garish attachment for his glasses that would undo any and all subtlety that he’d achieved. It would never happen, of course, but it was amusing to think about for a moment.

Eggsy heard Merlin’s amusement and against better judgment asked, “What?”

“Nothing. Just wondering why people don’t think you’re funny as well.”

He let out an indignant sound, something akin to a scoff. “Who says that?”

“I’m not—”

“No, no. C’mon, bruv. Who says I’m not funny? I know for sure it ain’t Lance—”

“When you reach the end of this stretch,” Merlin cut him off, glad to have something of importance to talk to him about, “the tunnel is going to split. Keep to your left.”

“Got it.” He was quiet for a bit until he reached the split in the hall. He did as Merlin instructed, and once he was a few strides underway again, he asked, “About how long am I gonna be on the run like this?”

Merlin crew in a deep breath. “I’d say long enough for you to start asking when we’re going to start issuing out sneakers.”

“We should!” Eggsy said, loud and emphatic enough to let Merlin know that he’d successfully reopened that particular can of worms whether he wanted to or not. “All the bloody running you make us do and we gotta do it in Oxfords? Absolutely brutal.”

“None of the other agents seem to have an issue with it.”

“Yeah?” Eggsy scoffed. “Bet none of them are brave enough to say it to your face.”

“Or maybe they realize that I’m not the one—”

“You’re not the one in charge of that. Yeah, yeah. You know—”

The rant that Eggsy was about to gear up for instantly went to the wayside as the quiet of the tunnels was cut with a high-pitched whirring noise. It wasn’t loud, but it was easy enough for Eggsy to pick out when the only other noise was his own breathing, and the relatively soft footfalls of the dress shoes he currently hated so much. The noise caused him to freeze, had him instantly holding his breath. He frantically looked around the tunnel. He was hoping for anything to clue him in as to what trap he’d potentially just set off.

“Merlin?” he spoke up. “Merlin what the fuck was that? You-you heard that, right?”

“Aye,” he said, clearly as annoyed with the situation as he was worried. It wasn’t often that he missed things, especially not things that put his agents in danger. He was hoping that he hadn’t been negligent, or that if he had, that it wasn’t going to cost Eggsy his life. There was the quiet tapping of his fingers against the tablet screen in his hands. “The only sensors that I’m picking up are ours. None of them have been tripped.”

Eggsy was caught between wanting to hold his breath, and also wanting to let his breathing get erratic the way that it was trying so hard to. “So, what, then? We’re just losing it?”

“I lost it years ago at this point, lad,” Merlin mumbled under his breath, not really meaning to say it out loud for Eggsy to hear but he was too immersed in trying to figure out the situation to stop himself.

“Not a real confidence booster, y’know.”

Merlin ignored his comment. A few seconds later, he cut out a short sigh of relief. “I think it was just a—”

Three quiet beeps killed the words that were on the tip of Merlin’s tongue.

“Run, Galahad.”

“What?”

“Run! You’ve got about seven seconds until—”

“Shit, shit, shit,” Eggsy repeated over and over again as he took off at a dead sprint. “Where the fuck am I going?”

“As far as that tunnel will take you before—”

That time his sentence wasn’t cut short by Eggsy, but rather by the explosion that was set off a few yards behind them. Eggsy wasn’t foolish enough to turn around and look at it head-on, but even with his back to it, Merlin could see through his lenses that the light coming off of it was enough to kick his glasses out of night mode for a moment.

Merlin was seeing things in technicolor as the blast threw Eggsy forward and shortly thereafter sent him skidding against the grimy concrete floor. Then it was Merlin’s turn to hold his breath, leaning forward onto the top of his desk as his eyes darted back and forth between the monitors in front of him and the tablet in his lap. He waited to hear Eggsy speak up. The feed from his lenses was blacked out but none of his biometric stats going drastically in one direction or the other. He didn’t know if that was promising or a guarantee of a nail in the coffin.

Just as Merlin was about to say something, Eggsy coughed. His glasses feed started to flicker back to life, although they were back in night mode. Eggsy was groaning and trying to get himself upright, at least to a sitting position, despite the ringing in his ears and the aching in his limbs.

“Galahad?”

“Yeah,” he coughed again. “Yeah I’m alright. Shit.”

“Can you walk?”

Eggsy let out a dry laugh. “What, if I say no are you gonna come and get me?” He hissed in discomfort as he forced himself up to his feet. “I’m good.” He patted where the inner pocket of his suit jacket was. “Hard drive’s gonna be smashed to shit, though.”

Merlin sighed in relief. “Let me worry about that. Just focus on getting to the rendezvous point.”

“Where the fuck am I supposed to be going?”

Even though the current situation wasn’t exactly humorous, Merlin had to laugh. “Only one way you can go now, lad.”

Eggsy chuckled through his exhaustion. “Real helpful.”

While he was getting himself moving again, Eggsy had been waiting for another sarcastic comment that never came. Instead he could hear muffled tapping and beeping from Merlin’s end of their comms. Now that they’d been working together for a bit, Eggsy knew better than to ask what he was doing. It was a tough habit to break, and sometimes much to Merlin’s dismay Eggsy still couldn’t quite stop himself from doing it. The standard response when Eggsy, or any of the agents, would ask what he was doing while he was in the middle of doing something, was, “I’d be able to tell you much quicker if you kept your mouth shut.” It was effective for the most part.

Eggsy knew better now, and in the moment he had other things to worry about and tend to. While Merlin’s earlier remark had been a snarky one, there really was only one direction that he could go in for the time being. He continued on, a little slower than before, a bit of a hilt to his gait, but he was moving forward at least.

“There’s nothing giving away when those tunnels were compromised,” Merlin finally said after a long bout of silence.

“And you wouldn’t’a forgot to tell me we were strapped up like that down here, right?”

“Galahad,” he chastised sharply. He pulled in a sharp breath. “Since I can’t tell when it happened, we have to assume it was recent.”

“Great. Shot at out there, blown up down here. What’s next, bruv?”

“Keep that glacial pace and you’re bound to find out.”

“I’d be able to move a bit faster if someone had been able to warn me about—”

“You should be coming up on the end of this stretch shortly,” Merlin cut him off, promptly as ever. It was so ingrained into their communication style now that neither of them ever took the time to comment or reprimand the other for it. Even if it was infuriating at times, it was also effective. “When you do, go left and about a hundred meters down there should be a hatch in the ceiling you can get out through.”

“Will that put me back above ground? I could really use some air with no dust or mold in it.”

“Don’t be dramatic—there’s no mold.”

“Didn’t answer my question.”

A few more seconds passed and Eggsy accepted the fact that Merlin wasn’t ever going to answer the question. He’d find out soon enough, he supposed, although Merlin’s silence wasn’t doing anything for his confidence levels. He’d managed to pick up the pace to a jog, adrenaline kicking back in and forcing the pain to subside for the time being. When he reached the end of the stretch, he turned to the left and kept on going.

He stopped right about where Merlin had told him the hatch would be. He scanned the top of the tunnel with his lenses, and sure enough he located a hatch. Taking a deep breath, Eggsy let his head drop back as he tried to think of the best way to get to it.

He’d never been the tallest of any group, Kingsman included. It wasn’t as though he was dreadfully short, and most times he wasn’t ever in a position where it caused an issue. But moments like this it presented the tiniest bit of a challenge. If it had been Merlin or Harry down there instead of him, they would’ve simply had to reach up,  maybe stretch just the tiniest bit, and they could undo the latch. But it wasn’t either of them down there.

As if Merlin could hear the thoughts going through Eggsy’s head, he said, “Good thing you’re a gymnast, then.”

Eggsy scoffed as he stood directly beneath the hatch. “Yeah, pommel horse is doing me a lot of good now, innit?”

“I think I recall you scaling walls in the past.”

Eggsy sighed, knowing that Merlin was right, and that at this point it was really the only way he was going to get out of there. His vertical was decent, but it was a lot harder to get that height from a standstill when one of his knees was throbbing the way that it was.

Backpedaling, he put a few strides between himself and his target in the ceiling. Taking a deep breath, he crouched down just slightly before picking up as much speed as he could given the short distance he was working with. Hopping up, he drove the ball of his foot into the wall and used it as a stepping stone to propel him farther upwards. He threw out his arm that was closest to the hatch, fingers managing to curl around the metal handle.

He immediately tightened his grip as much as he could, hoping that the sweat and grim on the palms of his hands weren’t going to make him slide off. When the rest of his bodyweight dropped, he was thankful that his grip didn’t give way, but the pull against his already-sore shoulder wasn’t exactly what he would call pleasant.

“Fuck me,” he grit out under his breath. Almost as frustrating as the pain was the realization that his weight wasn’t enough to cause the door to fall open. “Merlin, give me something here.”

“Seems like it’s locked.”

Eggsy grunted as he brought his other hand up and managed to fit them both onto the handle. “Thanks, couldn’t have figured that one out for myself.”

“Turn the handle clockwise and it should unlock.”

“How’m I—” He stopped himself this time before Merlin got the chance to. He sighed, thankful for the darkness and that even if it had been brighter Merlin wouldn’t have been able to see the look on his face anyway. “Can’t wait to be sat on that bloody plane,” he grumbled as he started to rotate and twist his body as best he could, using his weight to force the handle of the hatch to turn. He was sure it looked ridiculous, but at least it seemed to be working.

It didn’t take very long, although in Eggsy’s mind it had felt like hours of wriggling around like a fish on a hook. Finally, though, he was rewarded with the clicking of the lock coming undone. The door dropped with him still holding onto it, earning an oof out of him as the slight drop happened.

Even before Kingsman, getting up and out wouldn’t have been the most difficult feat in the world. Gymnastics as a child really had benefitted him in the long-run in ways that his mother probably hadn’t ever imagined. It made it easier to get away from Dean and his goons, for one thing. For another it did give him the upper-hand in a lot of mission scenarios. He came into the agency with skills that not many other agents had. Everyone had combat training—it was mandatory. But he had something else entirely on top of that as well.

Using his legs and hips, he swung to give himself a little bit of momentum before curling his arms, tucking his knees, and managing to contort himself enough to get his legs up through the opened hatch. Thankfully his heels dug into solid ground. It gave him a stable enough base so that his hands could let go of the hatch and he could use his core to pull him up the rest of the way. It wasn’t graceful. It wasn’t pretty. But it got the job done and that this point that really was all Eggsy could hope for.

He was practically lying on his stomach on the ground in the hopes of having a moment to collect himself and catch his breath. He didn’t allow himself to think about the smell and the grime of the floor beneath him, the floor that was incredibly close to his face in his current position. It wouldn’t be long before he had to be up on his feet and off again—he knew that. The fact that Merlin wasn’t immediately chirping instructions into his ear, however, had Eggsy thinking that maybe he could take about twenty seconds to himself after that little mishap.

“You did the hard part,” Merlin said, as though he could read Eggsy’s mind. “So I’m not gonna send anyone to your rescue now.”

Eggsy laughed, couldn’t help himself. “Brutal.”

“C’mon. Get yourself ready.”

He was too tired to even come back with anything snarky, so instead he just heaved out a sigh as he got himself upright again. He brushed his hands off on his pants, not that it really made much of a difference. “Right. What next, then?”

“You’re almost to the rendezvous point. Down this hall, there should be a stairway that’ll put you there.”

Eggsy was about to come back with a sarcastic, “Which way is ‘down this hall’?” when he looked around and realized that on the other side of the hatch from where he was, was nothing but a solid wall. The comment died on the tip of his tongue as he leaned down and reached to pull and lock the hatch back in place again. It was so much easier from the upper side of it.

When he started on his way, he asked, “What’s even waiting for me at the rendezvous, anyway? Chauffer? A pint?”

Merlin managed not to chuckle at that but there was still a hint of amusement in his voice as he said, “No chauffer, but there is a getaway car.”

Eggsy gave an impressed frown that Merlin couldn’t see. Despite the fact that Eggsy had been out and about on missions for a good while now, there was still part of him that was in a constant state of bewilderment over it all. No matter where he went, it seemed like there was already something there for him. He still didn’t understand how that was possible.

“So did you lot just go stealth mode in every city across Europe, then?” He was laughing as he asked the question, but it wasn’t really a joke.

“What?”

“I’m just trying to figure out how else you managed to have getaway cars and safehouses in every city that you’ve ever sent anyone to.”

“Not ever city.”

He scoffed playfully. “Pretty much, though.”

“That’s what happens when you’re around long enough. You grow.”

Eggsy could have easily and happily picked Merlin’s brain more about that. Harry had told him a lot about the history of the agency and how they came to be. But so much had to have happened between then and the moment Eggsy was currently in with Merlin. He wanted to know more about that. And, based solely on Merlin’s position and the vast amount of knowledge he seemed to have about everything, it appeared that he would be one of the best people to ask.

The history lesson, however, was going to have to wait until Eggsy figured out what exactly the getaway car situation was. He was assuming that it wasn’t going to be one of their standard issue taxis since it wasn’t as though someone was going to be driving him home in it. He wasn’t sure what it was going to be instead.

He came upon the staircase sooner than he had expected, not that he was complaining. He tried not to let himself feel too relieved as he quickly made his way up the steps. It wasn’t an area of expertise, per se, but something about how short and steep the stairs were had him thinking that whoever put all of this into place, was someone who was in Kingsman long before Merlin was. Maybe a few Merlin’s ago.

At the top of the staircase, Eggsy found himself in what appeared to be a garage. Looking around, he was trying to figure out what was built on top of it. He was fairly certain that he was back at ground level, and it wasn’t as though there was just going to be a standalone garage out in the middle of nowhere. Or maybe it was—Kingsman had done stranger things he was sure.

“Under the tarp there,” Merlin instructed.

Eggsy heard him, and he was vaguely aware that Merlin was still talking to him as he walked over to the small windows on the garage door. He knew that he should probably be listening, but he was too painfully curious to not at least sneak a little peek out. It felt like he’d been running for ages but realistically he knew that he couldn’t have gotten that far. It just had to be far enough to throw the scent of the men who had been after him.

Peering out onto the street, he did his best to see as much as he could without flattening his face against the glass. He had been expecting to see a little bit of chaos, some sort of reaction to the explosion that had gone off only a few minutes before, but there was nothing. People were shuffling up and down the street, grocery bags in the crooks of their arms like it was just any other day. Eggsy made a small sound of disbelief at it all.

“I wasn’t imaginin’ all that, right?” he asked Merlin, still looking outside as a few cars slowly drove by.

“No, you weren’t imagining it.”

“Then why don’t any’a these people seem like they noticed?”

“You’d be surprised what people can convince themselves off.”

“Convince themselves out of a bomb goin’ off? Jesus. Talk about neuro—”

“The car, Galahad. Focus so we can get you home.”

Without any argument, Eggsy turned on his heel and headed back to the tarp that Merlin had told him about before. Eggsy knew just from the layer of dust that was sitting on top of the cover that whatever was underneath hadn’t been touched in a long time. Hopefully the thing still turned on.

Holding his breath in the hopes of not sucking in all the dust that was about to come off of it, Eggsy grabbed some of the tarp in his hands, and started to pull it off and away from the big overhead doors at the front of the garage. With the light that was coming in through the windows, he could see the ridiculous amount of dust that went into the air. Despite his efforts, he still coughed.

He was distracted from all of that soon enough, however, when he saw the car that had been left to him. He sighed, head tilting back so that he was staring up at the ceiling. It wasn’t as though that’s where Merlin was, but he was still looking up and talking in that direction like that was the case.

“You’re fuckin’ joking me, right?”

This time, Merlin couldn’t hide his laughter. “Told you, lad, we’ve been around a long time.”

“Yeah, but, fuck, Merlin. This thing’s gotta be older than I am.”

“A lot of things are,” he retorted easily.

Eggsy rolled his eyes as he reached for the handle on the driver’s door. “This thing even gonna start?”

“Only one way to find out.”

He scoffed. “Right.” He sat down and looked around for the keys. Reaching underneath the driver’s seat, he quickly found them. “If it don’t, that means you gotta be the one to come and get me.”

“That’s not going to happen.”

“You owe me that.”

“It’s not going to happen because the car is going to start.”

Eggsy was muttering under his breath, low enough so that Merlin couldn’t hear exactly what he was saying. It was easy for him to imagine, though, even just based off of his tone. It was probably better for both of them that Merlin couldn’t make out each specific word.

Eggsy’s muttering turned into an exasperated sigh when the car didn’t start on the first try. “Told you this thing is too—”

“Try it again,” Merlin cut him off.

“If I keep doing that it’s gonna flood—”

“Humor me.”

He let out another sigh. “Fine.” He turned the key again, the car once more letting out that same struggling sound. That sound that meant the car was trying its hardest but it simply wasn’t turning over. “Still nothin’.” He heard Merlin drawing in a deep breath and Eggsy knew what the response was going to be. “But sure, third time’s the charm, yeah?”

The chuckle that Merlin let out had an air of tiredness to it, but there was something amusing to him about the way that he and Eggsy were finally getting to the point where they could predict things coming from the other. Even if they didn’t always agree on how things should be handled, they could usually tell what the other person was going to want the play to be. Over the years Merlin learned how to read pretty much every agent that come through during his time—it was practically a requirement for his job. What was less common was all of the agents reciprocating. Eggsy was managing it though.

He spoke up when the train of thought flitted back out of his head. “For your sake, lad, let’s hope so.”

Eggsy drew in a deep breath and shut his eyes tightly as he prepared to turn the key again. Neither of those things were going to impact the outcome at all, but it was still instinctive to do. Adjusting his pincer grasp on the key just slightly, he gave it another turn. The car struggled, but he didn’t let up. And then, after six of the longest seconds of his life, the car finally sputtered to life. It still didn’t sound like the car was in the best shape that it’d ever been, but the engine was going and that would have to do for the time being. Eggsy let out an audible sigh of relief, and Merlin was glad that between Eggsy and the car itself, there was enough noise on the other end of their comms that his relief wasn’t quite so easy to hear as well.

“Time to hit the road, then,” Merlin told him, casual as ever like they hadn’t almost needed to devise a completely different plan to get Eggsy home.

Eggsy went to put the car in drive as he laughed. “Lucked out this time, Merlin. But one’a these days I’ll get you outta your lair and into the field to save me.”

“How about you just try and make sure that you don’t need saving?” He paused as Eggsy laughed and then he realized that Eggsy was shifting gears. “While you could drive through the garage doors, Galahad,” he couldn’t help but to let a little bit of his snark out, “I don’t necessarily recommend it.”

Eggsy huffed out a quiet, “Shit,” as he hopped out of the car and went to pull on the handle of the overhead door. He gave it a tug and the door fought him for a moment. Rust on every part and just the general jams of a door left unopened for a long time weren’t working in his favor. He wasn’t going to let this be what stopped him now though. If it came down to it, he would go directly against Merlin’s recommendation and drive the car right through the damn door.

After squatting a little lower to get a better grip, giving it a strong pull upwards, Eggsy was rewarded with the aching creaks of the metal giving way to exactly what he wanted. Once he got the door up past his knee, it was much smoother sailing. When he’d gotten it high enough he used his shoulder to help push it up the rest of the way before scrambling back towards the car.

He didn’t allow himself too much time to think about it, but he was vaguely aware of how strange he probably looked to all of the pedestrians on the street and sidewalk. He was covered in dirt and grime, which would’ve looked strange in his regular clothes but it cut an even stranger image when he was in a suit. And, while a majority of the pain in his limbs had subsided due to the increase in adrenaline, he was certain that he probably had some cuts and such on his face and neck where people could see them. Whatever hopes he’d had of being able to blend in seamlessly were thrown out the window when the explosion went off, and now that he was driving a car that wasn’t kept in good enough condition to be considered vintage, he knew it was only going to make it even more impossible to do that.

For the time being, he was pushing all of that from his mind. Hopping back into the driver’s seat, he threw the car in drive and pressed down on the gas. According to the gauge, he should have enough to get him decently far, at least out of the current town that he was in. He had that going for him if nothing else. He wasn’t even sure how far he was going to have to take this thing, what Merlin’s next step of the plan was. When he first set out on this mission, he was just going to backtrack the way he’d came once he got the hard-drive and it would be as simple as that. The gunfire and the men chasing him caused some wrinkles in that plan, though. And now he didn’t have a good grasp at all on where he really was.

“We should really talk about going and updating what you’ve got on hand at all these safe-houses, Guv,” Eggsy said as he rolled out onto the street. Looking into his rearview mirror, he asked, “I’m not turning back around to shut that door again.”

“Don’t worry about it,” Merlin reassured. “Just take this road as far as it lets you. You’ve got a while to go before I can get you somewhere that can get you back to HQ.”

“Tube system doesn’t go throughout all of Europe? That what you’re telling me?”

“That’s exactly what I’m telling you.”

“I was serious about updating the cars, you know.”

“You’re always serious when it comes to things that you think I should be doing,” Merlin half-muttered.

“That goes both ways, I’m pretty sure,” Eggsy replied with a laugh.

Merlin was glad that Eggsy couldn’t see him smirking and shaking his head. “Just focus on the road, Galahad.”

As each block passed by and he got closer and closer to the edge of town, Eggsy found himself wanting to relax, wanting to believe that it was going to be smooth sailing from here on out, but he couldn’t quite settle into it. He couldn’t even blame it on the notion of knowing better, because it wasn’t that long ago that he was thinking that the only thing standing between him and a quick trip back home was a window he had to hop through. He’d been wrong then, and the last thing he wanted was to end up being wrong again.

Even Merlin’s voice had begun to shift as he gave instructions. That, if nothing else, should’ve brought Eggsy some comfort. All the snarky remarks with hardly any of the worry. Merlin could sense it too, could practically feel the jitters through the comms line.

The city had completely faded from the rearview mirror. Eggsy coasted down the hill he’d just crawled up, questioning the strength and integrity of the car’s engine the entire time, and the town disappeared behind the horizon line. As he reached the bottom of the hill, he hoped that the tension in his muscles would disappear with it.

“Fuck me,” he muttered under his breath as he made a pointed effort to unclench his jaw. He opened and closed his hands around the steering wheel a few times, trying to break the white-knuckle grip he’d been holding it with.

“Adrenaline wearing off?” Merlin asked even though he had a pretty good idea as to the answer.

Eggsy’s laugh had a note of dryness to it. “That what this is?”

“Aye, that or you’ve finally run out of jokes and requests for me.” He paused a beat. “And I don’t see that happening anytime soon.”

The next laugh that Eggsy let out was one that felt more genuine. “Yeah, can’t leave you hangin’ like that. You wouldn’t know what to do with yourself.”

Merlin smiled, half amusement, half relief. “Can’t imagine what I’d do with a little bit of silence,” he joked.

By the time that Eggsy made it back to HQ, hard drive still in tow despite everything that had happened, almost all of his jitters were gone. What had really done it was finally being able to sit down in the tube that would take him back to headquarters from the drop-point that Merlin had told him to go to.

No matter how long or chaotic a mission was or wasn’t, there was nothing quite like the comfort of coming back home afterwards. For Eggsy, that feeling usually didn’t fully hit him until he was fully back home in his flat with JB curled up by his feet. This time, though, the mere familiarity of the seats on Kingsman’s own version of a high-speed rail were enough to bring him that semblance of comfort. The exhaustion hit him at full-speed as well, nearly making him fall asleep sitting up, but his nerves didn’t let him get that carried away.

So now he was sat in the medical bay with the hard drive next to him on the mattress, legs hanging off the side of the bed they’d told him to wait in because he didn’t want to get too comfortable. His glasses and tie were discarded off to the side right alongside his cuff-links that miraculously hadn’t gotten lost in the shuffle of it all. His suit jacket was draped on the hospital bed next to him, folded haphazardly in a way that Harry would undoubtedly give him grief about when he came to check on him. Eggsy was too tired to worry about that for the time being. He worked on undoing the top two buttons of his shirt, allowing himself a little more room to breathe.

The doctor had given him a general once-over to make sure that nothing was broken. Eggsy wasn’t too worried about that—he knew what broken bones typically felt like and despite the aches and pains in his limbs, nothing felt that serious. He had tried to convince the doctor to let him go home to lick his wounds in peace, but he wasn’t able to get away with that. So there he was, sitting and waiting for her to come back with bandages and whatever salves they put into his cuts all the time to make sure he wasn’t going to get infected and lose an arm. He was sure it worked, he just wished that it wouldn’t sting so much while it did.

He turned slightly to look back at the pillow that was resting at the head of the bed. It looked so inviting in that moment. The beds were nothing spectacular, nothing like what they had in the actual dormitory rooms for the agents, but for hospital beds they weren’t that bad. It was tempting to just scoot himself back and lay down and, maybe, catch a couple minutes of shut-eye.

Before he could give into the urge, the door to the medical bay opened. Eggsy’s eyes snapped up, expecting to see Harry walking through the door. Instead, it was Merlin—clipboard tucked under his arm and all.

“I see you made it,” Merlin remarked as he stopped right in front of Eggsy.

“Say that like you weren’t chirping in my ear the whole time,” Eggsy said with a tiny chuckle.

Merlin hummed in response, as much of an affirmation as Eggsy was going to get. He stepped to the side and reached one hand out towards the mattress. Eggsy’s assumption was that he was reaching for the hard drive, the one thing that Eggsy had been sent off to get in the first place. Instead, Merlin picked up Eggsy’s suit jacket and folded it properly without a word.

It would’ve been so easy for Eggsy to make a comment about it, about Merlin coming in and instantly fussing with things after all that had happened that day. It would’ve been just as easy for Eggsy to reach over and mess up the jacket all over again. Both of those things would have been perfectly on-par for the two of them. But Eggsy refrained. Antics could be saved for another day.

The look in Merlin’s eye told Eggsy that he could practically hear every thought going through his head. Merlin was at least kind enough not to say anything about it. When he set Eggsy’s jacket back down, then he reached and picked up the hard drive.

“You both made it in one piece.” He turned the device over in his hand, hearing the loose pieces rattling around inside as he did. Then he looked at Eggsy, the first real look he’d gotten of him since he’d left, scrapes and grime and all. “More or less.”

“You talkin’ about—”

“Yes,” Merlin answered the question before Eggsy could finish it, knowing exactly where it was going.

Eggsy laughed. “Yeah, alright. Guess that’s fair.”

Merlin studied him for a moment. “What’d the doctor say?”

He shrugged. “Nothin’s broken. Gonna clean me up and ship me out.” He paused, watching as Merlin nodded in response to what he was staying. “You c’n stay if you want- Watch me squirm a bit.”

A smile passed over Merlin’s face as he shook his head. “Oh, I think I’ve been doing enough of that just trying to get you back home in one piece.”

“More or less,” Eggsy parroted back his words from moments before.

It got Merlin to chuckle. “Exactly.”

Eggsy drew in a deep breath before finally letting himself collapse back onto the bed. The position he was laying in didn’t look comfortable in the slightest as far as Merlin was concerned, with his legs still partially hanging off the side of the bed. Although given the events of the last twenty-four hours, he supposed that this wasn’t much more uncomfortable than any of the rest of it.

With a dramatic sigh, Eggsy draped one arm across his forehead. It wasn’t covering his eyes, but it was comforting in a strange way nonetheless. Letting his eyes close, he asked, “Really think you’re gonna get anything off’a that?”

He didn’t have to gesture to the hard drive for Merlin to know what he was talking about. “Doubting me now?”

Eggsy chuckled, eyes still closed. “Usually I’d say never, but after that car today—”

“I didn’t choose—”

“I’m just sayin’!” he said with a laugh, holding his hands up briefly in mock surrender. “Just sayin’. You can bring that,” he shot a pointed look at the black box in Merlin’s hand, “back to life and make lighters into grenades, but you can’t get anything from this century for your getaway cars.”

Merlin was shaking his head, looking down at the tech in his hands as he spoke to Eggsy. “I’ll be sure to pass your message along to the mechanics department.”

Eggsy knew that maybe he shouldn’t have been laughing so hard at that sentiment, but he couldn’t help himself. “Yeah,” he said as he shook his head, causing the pillow case to rustle beneath him, “they’ll be glad to hear it. They love me over there, you know.”

Merlin raised his eyebrows but kept his expression otherwise neutral. “That what they call it these days?”

Eggsy propped himself up partway on his elbows. “What’s that s’posed to mean? What’d they say to you?”

He shook his head. “They haven’t told me anything. But I see the condition you’ve sent cars to them in.” He let a pointed pause pass between them. “Love might not be quite the word.”

“Well, this time it ain’t my fault.” He saw the slightly confused look on Merlin’s face. “That car bein’ ancient and impossible to do anything with has nothing to do with me.”

Merlin nodded, trying to keep his expression under control. “I’ll pass that on as well.”

Eggsy was too tired to pretend that he didn’t find it all to be a little hilarious, a little ridiculous. Merlin was in better shape at the moment but even so, he found himself cracking a grin. It’d been a long few days. It was a relief to have Eggsy back, an even bigger relief that it’d all been successful. Merlin didn’t really have any further reason to lurk around. The doctor would make sure that Eggsy was set. Harry would come in sometime soon to check on his own. Eggsy would either crash in one of the rooms here or have one of the drivers take him back to his flat. Then they’d get ready to start moving onto the next thing the next day. But still, he stood there.

As though Eggsy could hear the other man’s thoughts, he spoke up. “I’m all good, bruv. I chat shit about that car,” he chuckled, “but it got me here.”

Merlin hummed in acknowledgment. “Right.”

“Go put some work in on the black box,” Eggsy half-joked about the hard drive. “See if there’s even anythin’ useful on it.”

He didn’t know what else to do besides nod as he held the tech a little closer to him. “Right.” He turned and started to walk back towards the med-bay doors when it hit him why it felt so wrong to just turn around and leave. “Before I look into replacing the cars,” he started off lightly enough, “I’m going to get to the bottom of what happened in those tunnels.”

Eggsy shook his head, giving a small dismissive wave at Merlin’s statement. “Shit happens all the time. Nothin’ we can do about it all.”

He frowned, not a fan of that sentiment in general but especially not in circumstances like this. “Maybe not all,” he conceded, not looking to get into an argument that wouldn’t change much of anything.

“Don’t let it keep you up,” Eggsy offered, trying to lighten Merlin’s dampened mood as best he could. He let out a tired laugh as he settled a little deeper into the hospital mattress beneath him. “’m not, that’s for sure.”

“I see that.”

Merlin waited a moment, thinking that Eggsy was going to have something else clever to say in response. Instead he was just met with silence, save for the deep breaths Eggsy was taking the more that his exhaustion took him over. The dramatic swing of the pendulum, from hopped up on adrenaline to utter exhaustion due to the lack of it, was nothing new to Merlin. He saw agents go through it all the time. Still, there was something about it that never fully lost its novelty.

He took that as his cue to finally head back. He turned on his heel and strode towards the door. Just as he reached and grabbed the doorknob, he heard the doctor coming back with a small collection of things that would get Eggsy patched up enough to be cleared and go home. Very rarely did Merlin ever hang around for this part. He cast a glance back over his shoulder and he saw the way that Eggsy had forced his eyes open, the way he was talking and laughing quietly with the doctor that was patching him up. It would be jokes in between wincing from the cleaning of cuts, Merlin was sure. It was Eggsy, after all.

Merlin had lost track of time once he got back to his station and started to work on extracting the information from the hard drive. Between trying to pull information from the drive, and also trying to get in touch with their teams that had control of the surveillance footage of the tunnels, he’d stayed plenty busy. He didn’t think that he was going to get all of the answers about the drive or about the explosion in the tunnel immediately, but he still wanted to start trying. All the questions he had were ones that needed to be answered. It was easy to get lost in all of the work. That wasn’t anything new—there never seemed to be any concept of time for him once he sat down in front of the monitors. They had clocks built into them, sure, but it always seemed to just fade into the background after a certain point. The only thing that had alerted him to how late it’d gotten was his watch. He’d set the vibration for this exact purpose—it was like last call at the bar only much gentler.

He sighed as he leaned back in his chair. Interlocking his fingers, he rested his hands on the back of his head. “Right, then,” he mumbled to no one in particular.

If he stayed any later, he knew that he was just going to regret it in the morning. That was how the alarm on his watch came to be in the first place anyway. Moving his hands so that they were resting on his knees, he pushed himself up out of the chair. With a quickness that was second-nature to him, he began shutting down all of his monitors except for one. The one left standing would continue trying to decode and pull information from the hard drive until he got back in the next day. The information would be the same whether he sat there and waited until the exact moment it hit, or if he came back in the morning after a semi-decent night’s sleep, some tea, and a good breakfast. And the latter sounded much more appealing at the moment.

Once he’d made the decision to pack it in for the night and head home, it was as though his body had taken that memo and instantly started shutting down. A weariness that hadn’t been setting in over the last few days of stress and minimal sleep was beginning to steamroll him now. The same thing he’d watched happen to Eggsy in real time a few hours before was now happening to him. It made sense—while their roles and stressors had been different in the specifics, they were still in it together. That’s how Merlin had always seen it.

He was making his way through the halls of HQ. It was quiet, silent almost. But it wasn’t dark. That was the thing about headquarters—there was never a time when all of the lights were off. Sections would be dark, but there was always a little bit of light scattered around. Sconces in the halls, dimmed lights in the kitchen and other common areas. The only places that really descended into full darkness with the bedrooms themselves. At the core of it, it was a safety thing. If all the lights in the building went out it would mean that there was something going on, something wrong. Merlin knew that it was a security measure, but on nights like these, it felt much more like a comfort measure. They all spent a considerable amount of time in HQ, him more than others really, and the soft warm lighting regardless of what time of day or night it was made the place feel a little more like home.

As he was walking, he tilted his head down so that his gaze was angled at the floor. He reached and took his glasses off, holding onto them with one hand while he gently rubbed small circles against the bridge of his nose with the other. His eyes shut in the process of it. A tiny moment of reprieve. When he opened them up again and lifted his chin so that he was looking straight ahead once more, he found himself nearly running right into Eggsy.

They both stopped just in time, just enough space left between them so that when they rested back on their heels they weren’t suffocating each other. Merlin didn’t say anything at first, allowing Eggsy’s quiet laughter to fill the silence.

He looked a little better now. A lot of that could be chalked up to the fact that he had, at bare minimum, changed out of his suit that was stained with mud and grime and all manner else. The sweat and filth had been washed off of his face. The only things that gave away how the last few days had gone for him now were the small bandages on his face, and the dark circles under his eyes. But he looked as put together as someone padding around in their pajamas could hope to look. His hair was damp from the shower but it was combed somewhat in place.

“Why—”

“What—”

They both finally tried to speak, both starting and stopping at the same time as they tripped over each other. It got another laugh out of Eggsy as he tucked his hands into the pockets of the gray pj’s he was wearing. It crossed Merlin’s mind briefly that despite all of the clothes at his disposal in HQ, Eggsy somehow always ended up in the same basics that they gave to each round of recruits, the same ones that he wore not terribly long ago in the grand scheme of things.

“What’re you still doing here?” Eggsy spoke up again when it became clear that Merlin was going to let him speak first.

Setting his glasses back in their rightful place, Merlin gave him a look that said the reply that he didn’t quite want to give out loud. A look slightly raising his eyebrows, mouth flattening into a thin line, and silently said, “What the fuck to you think I’m still doing here?”

Silent or not, Eggsy got the answer loud and clear. He wasn’t fazed by it, cracking a grin. It was all comedy to him on some level. “Yeah, alright, that’s a bit obvious.” He shrugged. “Get anything off it yet?”

He shook his head. “Not yet. I’ll check back on it in the morning.” He paused, watching as Eggsy nodded, seeing the way that the information piqued his curiosity but Eggsy knew better than to ask. Merlin asked the question that had been on his mind in the first place. “Why didn’t you go home?”

Confusion altered Eggsy’s features for a moment, still stuck on what could potentially be on the hard drive. When he finally caught up, he gave a casual shrug. “Beds here were closer.”

Merlin chuckled, knowing that there had been plenty of times over the years when he used that very same justification for not taking the time to head back home. Everyone in Kingsman went through it at some point or another, everyone from field agents to people who worked in the tech and mechanic departments.

That being said, Merlin knew just as well as any of them that there were few things better than falling asleep in his own bed after a chaotic day. Even if the beds felt too far away to make them worth the trip.

“You should head home.”

Eggsy yawned as he shook his head. “T’morrow. JB and I are just gonna crash here for the night. Besides,” he chuckled, “I don’t think I should be driving.”

Merlin sighed, knowing that no amount of gentle nudging was going to get Eggsy to actually head back to his own flat. If he hadn’t asked one of the taxis to bring him back earlier at what was still a reasonable hour, he definitely wasn’t going to change his mind and do it now. Merlin offered the next best thing, perhaps the more convincing thing.

“Go and get JB—I’ll bring you home.”

Eggsy immediately shook his head. “No. It’s alright, really. I’ll just—”

“Eggsy,” he said simply. His tone wasn’t harsh, but it didn’t leave any room for argument. Merlin wanted to be in his own bed as much as Eggsy wanted to be in his. Apparently Merlin wanted to be in his own home even more-so.

A lop-sided grin started to spread over Eggsy’s face. “Alright. Let me go and grab JB then.” He stepped past Merlin and continued making his way down the hall. He called back over his shoulder a quick, “Thanks,” before rounding the corner at the end of the hall.

Merlin was sitting in the driver’s seat of his car, the back of his head pressed against the seat and his eyes closed. The tiny bulb above the console was the only light in the car, the long driveway outside dark even with the lamps scattered down the stretch of it. He left the radio off, enjoying the silence.

It didn’t take Eggsy long to grab JB and his bag. Soon enough he was opening the back door of Merlin’s car to toss his bag down. The suddenness of it caused Merlin to flinch, shooting upright in his seat. He relaxed once he saw that it was Eggsy, shaking his head as he rubbed at his eyes for a moment. Taking a deep breath, he waited for Eggsy to slide into the passenger seat beside him.

Eggsy plopped down, still in the pajamas from headquarters, with JB sitting happily on his lap. When Merlin turned to look at Eggsy, he found that both him and his dog were already staring at him. For some reason JB’s stare seemed to be more intent than Eggsy’s and Merlin wasn’t sure how he felt about it.

“Didn’t think you’d let JB in the car,” Eggsy joked.

Merlin sighed as he shifted the car out of park. “Don’t make me regret it.”

Eggsy chuckled softly as he started to melt into the seat of Merlin’s car, his arms wrapping around the small dog in his lap, his eyes starting to close. “Thanks for this.”

Merlin shook his head even though Eggsy wasn’t looking over at him. “It’s on the way.”

He hummed in acknowledgment. “Thanks for everythin’ else, too.”

Despite the exhaustion, and all the stress that they’d been through and caused each other over the last few days, Merlin smiled as headquarters started to get smaller in his rearview mirror. “It’s what we do.”

[pineau-noir]

Tonight's offering is sensory deprivation!

And I cannot stress how little plot there is. It's a negative amount of plot lol

Guess what????

I'm doing Kinktober!

...and for another fandom lol?

Anyway, find the master post HERE and all the days will be under the cut

List by absurdthirst

October 1: Hand Jobs

October 2: Voyeurism

October 3: Pet Play